Chapter 35

And she said to him, “How can you say, ‘I love you,’ when your heart is not with me? You have mocked me these three times, and you have not told me where your great strength lies. - Judges 16:15

We all need money and nice things in order to live a comfortable life. I must admit, I'm addicted to good life. I've always been like that and will forever be. I love things, that's a fact. But there's a stage where you have to decide what is more important between your pride as a man and the good life. Maureen had been good to me financially but she was doing more harm to my ego as a man. She literally controlled my life. When she told me she could track my movements with the AMG I decided to be a man and put my foot down. I looked at her and told her straight in the face that I will not have sex with her. It was the very first time I did that to her. I always worshipped the ground she walked on and she took advantage of that. She was like "ha ha ha ha that's very funny Rhulani. You never said no to me before. Stop being a brat and make me come". I decided to tell her what has been in my mind for quite some time "screw you Maureen. I'm tired of this shit. You treat me like a kid. You made me blow a gay dude in Cape Town, you fucken made me go bail your boyfriend, you talk to me like I'm a kid, you don't respect me, I'm forever under your surveillance etc. I can't take this shit anymore. I want out. You can take your cards, car and stop paying my rent. It will be difficult but I will survive". I handed her the cards and car keys. She was like "oh, now that you have spent my thousands you think I'm no longer good. You'll come running to me boytjie". She took her stuff and left. I didn't even care who was going to drive the AMG.

It was an emotional decision but I felt relieved I did it. I wanted to be her toy boy, not some zombie she could control whenever she wanted. I still had my Golf...well, she was paying for it and I guessed she was going to stop. I took out a pen and paper and worked out my budget. I could still leave comfortable but had to cut down on unnecessary stuff. Maureen wasn't the end of my life. I'm not a prayer person but that day I knelt down and thanked God for finally helping me to get rid of Maureen out of my life. Immediately after the prayer Eve called me. She went "you made a good decision and I'm very proud of you. You won't regret it. And I'm sorry for the way I reacted the last time I saw you". I asked her what she was on about and she told me Maureen told her about the break up. Jeeezz, can women keep news to themselves mara? No wonder they always snatch one another's men. The very same person you share personal stuff with is the one who's gonna snatch your partner from you. I told her the relationship wasn't working out and had to leave. She was like "now that it's just me I'm gonna show you how to treat a man. That AMG she took, I can buy you a new one tomorrow...same colour and everything. As long as you promise you will be mine only". When I was in high school older guys used to tell me how sugar mamas spent money on them and I thought they were kidding. Actually, I used to think they were lying. I remember some woman once bought my neighbour a Golf 4 GTI. We didn't believe it until he showed us the papers. Never underestimate the power of a dick. I told Eve we should meet and talk in person before we take any step further. She agreed and went "please stay away from my daughters". Women women women, she knew I was after Ntombi or Ntombi was after me but she still wanted me.

That night I slept with mixed emotions. I missed the AMG but at the same time I was glad I had my life back. I didn't even know where I put the Golf keys. I called my cousin Terence, remember the guy I left at my place when I went to Cape Town with Maureen. I don't know why I called him, I just wanted to talk nje. He went "how is Mercy? Did you manage to sort out your issues? That girl has a very good heart man. You should consider her when you want to marry". Terence was one of those guys who weren't street smart enough to spot a psycho. In his eyes Mercy was this perfect girl with a good heart. Only if he knew what she was capable of. I decided to ignore the Mercy topic and talked about family stuff. Talking about family made me miss my mom. I hardly talk about my parents because they were the reason I couldn't maintain a relationship for too long. Remember in chapter 1 I said my parents divorced due to my father's infidelity. The divorce shattered me and I think it's the reason I never commit to one girl. I told Terence the next weekend would be dedicated to my family. I had family in Chiawelo, Soweto where I was born, Soshanguve (Pretoria) where my mom and dad moved to from Soweto and Difateng, Tembisa where my mom moved to after the divorce. When a Tsonga woman thinks of divorce, just know she's fed up. Tsonga women can stay in an unhealthy relationship for years. Talking to Terence helped me a lot. I slept like a baby that night.

In the morning I was woken by Eve calling to greet and wish me a fabulous day. She meant well but it wasn't necessary. I thanked and wished her the same. She said she would come see me the following day because it was Friday to talk about the car I wanted. I wasn't very keen about the car but didn't mention it. I went to work and everything went as normal. I knocked off and went to place. That day I switched my phone off because I didn't want any disturbance. I switched on my phone on Friday morning. Maureen called me. I ignored her and she sent an sms "if you don't take my calls I'm gonna come to your workplace". She called again and I picked up. She went "ok I understand you are angry at me and understandably so. I was wrong and I apologise. I was bitchy on you, I owe you an apology. Please come fetch your car and the cards. I'll make sure the car is registered in your name. As long as you promise you won't do shit in front of me. To show I'm serious about this, I'm taking you to Kruger National Park tomorrow. Make arrangements at work. We will be back on Tuesday". I had to think, and think fast. For the first time Maureen sounded really sorry for what she did. I could feel she was talking from the bottom of her heart. I thought of the AMG in my name, the cards and a nice weekend in Kruger National Park. I was like "I will come fetch the car today after work". I know I said I wanted her out of my life but hey...everyone deserves a second chance. After talking to her I went to work. Eve called me and went "meet me after work. I have a surprise for you". Eish, now things were getting complicated. I told her I had plans which I couldn't cancel and she understood. After work I went straight to Maureen's house. The AMG was parked by the street and I couldn't stop smiling. I walked to the house and shiiiittt....Maureen was with her BFF. Maureen went "thanks for coming babe".

I froze... and within seconds there was blood on the floor...

THE END

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LETTERS SECTION

Hy Shaz

Im 28 and have been married for only 6 months, my husby and I dated for 5 years and got married in january this year, while we were dating everything was perfect and maybe thats the reason i decided to agree to marry Him, but after we got married i nolonger feel Him while we making love, i even hate sex, everything He does while we having is so wrong, but while we were dating I never felt that way and now that thing is coming between us and causing problems. I love my husband a lot and i dont wana lose Him because of Sex, pls help me.what can i do to boost my sexual feelings.

Unknown from Free-State

Chapter 34

There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers - Proverbs 6:16-19

Some girls prove God is the greatest artist in the world, they define the perfection of beauty. You look at them and think marriage on the spot. They look like they don't even go to toilet to do number 2. I'd spend the whole day looking at her. I'd actually take a leave from work just to look at her sexy body and beautiful face. I'm a very confident guy naturally but that day I found myself on the other side of confidence. I wanted to greet and ask for her number but my heart was beating fast. You know a girl is hot when she gives Rhulani some hesitation tendencies. The thing is it was in a public space. Beautiful girls have a tendency of being rude in public, especially if you are Johnny Walker - someone without a car. I was in a German machine but that didn't boost my confidence. I can deal with many things but an embarrassment in public aint something I'm fond of. Black people can laugh at you until you commit suicide lol. I didn't wanna be a victim of that. I parked my car while my eyes were still tailing the yellow bone. She entered the bottle store and I smiled. It was the perfect opportunity for me to hit. I followed her into the bottle store. She took 12 Red Square dumpies and walked towards the tills. I took 12 Heineken cans and followed her. I wanted to say something but my mouth was very stiff. She gave the cashier her bank card. The machine rejected the card twice because of insufficient funds. The cashier was getting very impatient. She asked him to swipe for the last time and same shit happened. The cashier went "look here girl, next time check your balance before you come here. You wasted my time".

Her face was wearing embarrassment and I could see she wanted to cry. I decided to be her hero. I looked at the cashier and went "Ey bru, that's not a way to talk to customers. Your boss must invest in training his or her employees on how to handle customers. We pay your salary. Don't do that next time or you'll lose customers. Actually, I'll pay for this beautiful lady's drinks". She looked at me and went "thanks. If you don't mind we can go to my flat so I can give back your money. I have money but I think I took the wrong card. Thanks for defending me". I started whistling internally. I got more than I expected. She probably didn't have money. She said that out of embarrassment. After paying she wanted to carry her booze and I told her to relax. I was like "relax ma'am. I will carry your bottles for you". I headed straight to my car and she followed me. She was like "I don't stay far, we can walk. I wanna give you your money". I insisted on us using the car. She gave in and got in the car. She went "your car is beautiful. Your girlfriend is lucky to have a man who drives a nice car". I knew where she was going with that. She was indirectly asking if I had a girlfriend....for her own agenda of course. Lol some girls suffer from motorholism, the condition of loving guys who drive beautiful cars. I went "I'm actually single. Girls can be stressful. I prefer to have some peace in my life". She told me I was too gorgeous and gentlemanly to be single. She was like "not all girls are a pain in the ass. I'm not a kind of girl that would stress a gentleman like me. Pity I only date assholes. I quit dating last year". Lol that was her way of telling me she was available. I decided to play along. I said "well, maybe God was reserving you for Rhulani". She asked who Rhulani was and I said "the guy driving this car". She smiled from ear to ear. She directed me to her place. I parked the car next to her flat and she left to go fetch my money.

In honest truth, I didn't want the money. I just wanted to see if she was the truthful type. While waiting for her Lebogang called. She was like "you promised to come see me today. You are just like other guys". I told her I tried to call but her phone was off. She went "oh ja, sorry bae. My battery died and because of load shedding I couldn't charge it. But you can come now". I told her I'd see her in an hour or so. I waited for more than 20 minutes and there was no sign of the yellow bone. I didn't even know her name or have her cell number. I regretted letting her go. She was too beautiful to let go. I decided to wait and she came after 30 minutes. She got in the car and went "I'm sorry, I was busy on a call with my mom. She was telling me she got robbed R5 000 today. Nxa crime is getting out of control in this country". I had a feeling she was lying. She probably wanted me to feel sorry for her and not demand my money back. I held her hand and told her I was sorry about what happened to her mom. She gave me R110 made up of coins. It was quite obvious the 30 minutes she spent in the flat she was actually looking for money. I almost laughed but didn't wanna seem heartless. I told her she can keep the money. I went "I just wanted to test if you were the trustworthy type. I'm glad you are trustworthy. Anyway, why are you drinking during the week?". She laughed and went "I wrote my last paper today. I just wanna celebrate nje". I wish her best of luck with what she wrote and told her I was leaving. She was like "aren't you gonna give me your number? In case I want someone to pay for my booze in future...ha ha ha ha. Oh and my name is Gontse". I gave her my number and left.

I didn't even go to Industrial Shisanyama as planned. I had to go see Lebogang. I opened one Heineken and put it between my thighs while driving. Lol before I had a car I always wished to do that. My uncle did it a lot when I was a kid and I thought it was a sign of le good life. I called Lebogang to tell her I was on my way to her place ans she told me "I'm ready for you". I didn't understand what she meant but I let it go. When I got to the gate I told the security who I was visiting and they told me where to park. One guard was like "boss, I don't know you but whatever muti you are using I want it. Many guys have tried to win that girl's heart but failed". Security guard are like CIA, they know everything, especially those who guard residential complexes. I told the dude I was Lebogang's cousin and he went "oooops sorry...I thought you....". When I got to the door I remembered how Maureen called me to go bail her man. I felt some hatred for her at that moment. I knocked and she shouted "come in". Damn, she was wearing nothing but a maroon g-string and a bra. I wanted to look away but hey, eyes are like boys, they just can't look away from a sexy thing. I was like "no no no Lebogang, I came here to listen to your personal problems. I didn't come for this. You are still a kid and I won't forgive myself if I ....you know". She went "just sushhhh and enjoy what I'm gonna do to you". She whispered "follow me". She walked to what looked like a bedroom. I didn't even think, I headed straight to the main door and left. YES I LEFT A NAKED CHICK. I got to the car, started the engine and left. My phone ran and I thought it was Lebo...and shit, it was Maureen. She went "meet me at your place in 10 minutes. Before I could lie about my whereabouts she went "don't even go there. I can track that car with my phone. I know you are not far". Mxm what a witch. She was watching my every move. We got to my complex's gate at the same time. She was wearing rather...umh very sexy. When we got to the house she went "do what you do best. Fuck me"

I looked at her and went "no, I can't". She took a deep breathe and ....

THE END

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Dear Shaz

I am 19 dating a 25 year old guy. He is a great guy and my family like him. We haven't had sex yet because I'm not ready. But my readiness is not the reason we haven't had sex yet, he has never made any move. My exs demanded sex within a week of dating. I've been with this one for 3 months now and he has never tried anything. I slept at his place 4 times and we just kissed and cuddled the whole night. Do you think he's hiding something from me?

Regards,

Jabulile, Kwa-Ndebele

Chapter 33

No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money" - Matthew 6:24

You know that moment you are angry because of a woman and another woman wanna try her luck you? It's like someone offering you a glass of whiskey when you almost got hit by a car because you were drunk. All I wanted was to work out the anger out of my system. Maureen took care of me financially but she didn't care about my emotional well-being. She had a tendency of going all heartless on me. What she did to me was uncalled for. Yes, she was the reason I was living a good life but I felt she was hijacking my happiness piece by piece. Leaving her would mean I'd go back to my hustling ways of relying on my salary for survival. Well, I could survive but I'd be broke most of the time. I had 2 of Maureen's credit cards and I could use them on whatever I wanted. I was driving the AMG she bought. Most guys can only drive AMG's in their dreams and fantasies. The girl at the gym repeated what she said "I said I'm sleeping at your place tonight. Did you hear me?". The funny part was I didn't even know her name. She was some girl who loved working out next to me whenever I went to gym. You know those girls who would show you directly that she wanted to give you some pussy. She wasn't bad looking but I didn't find her attractive. Actually, I hated her fake American accent. I don't mind people twanging but don't try to fake an American accent. Maybe it charms other guys but it turned me off. I went "well, not tonight. I have some work things to do". She looked disappointed. She was like "I'm starting to think you don't find me attractive". I decided to say something that would get her off my back. I said "maybe it's because you are not attractive". She was like "ouch" and left. Sometimes you have to say ruthless things to get some people off you ass.

After gym I headed straight to my place. I was a bit hungry but lazy to cool. I ate 2 bananas and an apple. I'm a Tsonga guy and I love my pap and meat. But that night I was too tired to cook my favourite meal. I didn't even have time for TV, I just wanted to sleep. As soon as I hit the bed my phone rang. I was almost like a culture for girls to call me just before bedtime. It was like my voice was their lullaby. It was Mercy. Mercy was like a mosquito at night. The more you showed I showed she was an irritant I'm my life was the more she called regularly. She went "sorry to disturb you...actually sorry to disturb me. I just wanted to tell you my man and I just had the great sex ever. Are you jealous". Case closed, Mercy wasn't ok upstairs. Who does that mara huh? I was like "I don't know what you are smoking but whatever it is you should stop it. Why the fuck would I be jealous? You are nothing to me. Actually, I want to forget you exist. Do me a bloody favour and stop calling me. Or else I'm gonna be forced to take legal action against you. I'm tired of your fucken psycho behaviour nxa". She suddenly started laughing. She was like "hey relax babe. No need to get worked up. Shem, now I see you still love me...the way you reacted when I told you I just had sex. My pussy is for one person only, the one and only Rhulani Chauke. I promise I will never cheat on you. As long as you promise you'll give me attention and we'll make another baby. You know I already have a name....Rhume. It's a combination of our names. Do you like it?". I couldn't take it anymore, I hung up. I said a prayer "Lord, please kill Mercy. Amen".

After the deadly call I struggled to sleep. But around 11pm the gods of sleep stole me into their world. It was my lucky night, the gods of sex offered me what every man wishes to dream of. I was chowing some hot chick in my dream. In the dream, my dick was operated by batteries and it was vibrating inside her tight pussy. Chowing a girl with a tight pussy is like the feeling you get on pay day after weeks of being broke. Chowing a chick with a loose pussy is like that debit order that takes your last money. Hope you get my drift. I was woken up by my phone vibrating. I checked time and it was exactly 12am. The call was from the kid, Lebogang. She said "hope I didn't disturb your beautiful sleep babes". To say I was angry would be an understatement, I was furious. Dreams like that come once in ages and she had to disturb me. I asked her what she wanted and why she called that late and she went "I just wanted to hear your voice. I miss you". I wanted to tell her crap but her voice was so sweet and innocent. It was like I was talking to an angel. I told her I'd call her in the morning. She went "nuh, we can talk now. I have night shift free minutes babes. We can talk until 1am". Now you will understand why I try all my best to stay away from High School kids. Just imagine an AMG-driving guy of my age staying up until wee wee hours of the morning just for free minutes. I went "babe, I have a very soft spot for you but right now I want to sleep because I have a busy day in the morning. Use those minutes to call some guy your age. I'm old enough to be your stepfather. Good night". I switched off my phone immediately after the call. I couldn't take the shit anymore. I prayed for the dream I had earlier but instead I got a whack one, I was a herding my grandfather's cattle in the new dream. In the morning I woke up feeling like I was on top of the world. I switched on my phone and immediately a call came in. It was Lebogang apologising for calling late she went "I was lonely and sad. I just wanted someone to talk to. I miss my parents and my cousin is hardly here. I wanted to commit suicide but hearing your voice made me change my mind. I'm sorry and I promise I won't call that late again". She hung up.

Shit the call touched me big time. She was longing for her parents' love and attention and she wasn't getting any. I felt bad for the way I spoke to her. I sent an SMS to tell her I'd visit later. She was a type I didn't wanna get sexually involved with. She would end up seeing a dad in me and ultimately become very obsessed. Yes, many girls who get obsessed with boyfriends have a history of daddy issues. Luckily when I got to work my immediate boss wasn't there. I was my own boss that day. Zama sent me an email to tell me she had won some voucher to go eat at a fancy restaurant and she wanted to go with me. I told her it was cool but it had to be on weekend. I knocked off at 12pm. I called Lebo to ask what time I should come see her but her phone was off. I headed straight to my place. I was driving slow because I wasn't in a hurry for anything. As I was driving I saw some chick walking to the opposite direction. Damn, she looked too good to ignore. She was wearing all white and looked like something from the sky. I U-turned and opened the window. I greeted her nicely and she greeted back with a smile. The nice thing about driving an AMG in South Africa is you don't have to worry about chicks giving you shitty attitude. The car did 80% of the job and mine was just to finish off. I asked her where she was going and she said Arcadia. I offered to drop her there and I'm sure she got wet at that stage. I could see she was so excited. She introduced herself as Queen from Bloemfontein. She was staying in Arcadia. I asked her what she was doing in Centurion and she went "I was visiting my boyfriend. I left because he's treating me like crap. I don't think I'll ever come back". I sensed she was lying just to score points. That's what a nice car does to these so-called beautiful girls. I was like "he's a fool. How can he treat ximatsatsa like you like crap? Don't worry....you'll find a man who treats you like a princess". She took out her phone and started taking selfies. Lol what a turn-off. She was exposing herself. I dropped her at Nedbank Plaza in Arcadia. She gave me her number and left. I decided to go buy 12 Heineken at some bottle store in Sunnyside and go chill at Industrial Shisanyama.

As I was parking my car at the bottle store, my eyes showed me a very beautiful yellow bone. She was .......

THE END

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LETTERS SECTION

Dear Sharon

How do you deal with an issue where you are with a girl and when you have sex with her she acts numb and acts as if you are not doing a thing? And on another issue what do you to make sure u don't come quickly? In fact what causes early ejaculation?

Thanks

Sexy Boy

Chapter 32

A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls - Proverbs 25:28

Sometimes you have to make decisions that will benefit you in a long run. Most of the time those decisions are not the ones we like. I had to choose between chowing the little kid and helping the woman who bought me an AMG. It might look like an easy decision from outside but it was tough. A new pussy is something we all look forward to, especially if it's a young pussy. On the other hand Maureen was my cash cow. She was the woman who took care of me. At the very same time she was the woman who stood me up. I was still angry at her but anger did not have money to buy me an AMG. I turned back and headed to the car. Maureen was more important than a pussy I wouldn't benefit anything from. When I got to the car I called my lawyer friend, Masilo Motsai. Luckily he picked up. I told him I had a situation and needed some legal help. I said "I don't have details now but can you please bring your ass to Lyttelton Police Station". He told me he would be there in 20 minutes. I was lucky he didn't stay far from Centurion. I started the engine and left. When I passed the gate one of the security guards went "that was quick. Was she that bad?". Lol he probably thought I chowed Lebogang. I told him "I'm going to buy food. I'll be back shortly". I didn't want him to think I was a 1-minute man.

When I got to Police Station I spotted Maureen's car. I went straight there and found her sitting in the car. I wasn't expecting to find her in a car, I thought she was behind the bars. I asked what was going on and she went "it's a long story. I will explain later". Mxm don't you get pissed when people give you that answer? What is a long story if I may ask?  She asked if I organised a lawyer and I said yes. I called Masilo Motsai to ask how far he was and he told me he was just 10 minutes away. He was one of those lawyers I could count on whenever I had legal issues. While waiting for Masilo I asked Maureen why she stood me up. She said "do you have to talk about it now? There's a problem and I wanna have it solved asap. Standing you up is not even in the top 5 of my priorities right now. Let's wait for your lawyer and we'll talk afterwards". She looked very troubled and deep in thoughts. I decided to shut my big mouth and just wait for Masilo. Within 5 minutes he called to tell me he was at the police station. I directed him to where we were and he came. Masilo came and I introduced him to Maureen. Maureen went "Ok here is the story. I was with a male friend of mine earlier having drinks at a restaurant. Another male friend, well, someone from my past came and he didn't like the fact that I was with another man. They argued and the next thing there was blood on the floor. The one from my past was beaten by the one arrested here. I want him released tonight. Money is not a problem".

To say I was shocked would be an understatement. While I was waiting for her she was out slutting with other men. She didn't even apologise or explain she was occupied. The worst thing was the fact that she asked me to organise a lawyer for her boyfriend. I was furious. I thought of leaving the car but didn't wanna act childish in front of Masilo. Masilo asked her few questions and she answered. Some of them were going straight to my heart. The truth of the matter is even if you don't love someone, for as long as you fuck her you'll get jealous when other guys go for her. Masilo left the car and went inside the police station. As soon as he left I turned to Maureen. I was like "Maureen, did you stand me because of the guy arrested here? How could you? You invite me to your place and then go out with other men. On top of that you ask me to organise a lawyer for your boyfriend. Wena you think you are a hit neh. You are nothing but just a piece of trash". She looked at me with astonished eyes. She was like "listen here young man, you are neither my boyfriend nor my husband. You cannot tell what to or not to do. Your job in my life is to fuck me and make me reach orgasm....something you have been failing to do lately. Who I see and what I do with them is none of your damn business. Hope this is the last time you raise your voice when you speak to me". Shit, I didn't expect that one. I went "when I cheated in Cape Town you punished me. You are being unfair. You can do kak but when I do kak it's an issue". She went "Rhulani, if you want out do so. I won't stop you. But please don't forget to give me my car keys".

Masilo came back while we were arguing. We kept quiet as soon as he got in the car. He told us he managed to get the guy released. Maureen asked where the guy was and Masilo told her the dude was still busy with paperwork. Maureen thanked Masilo and asked him to give her his bank details. She asked to use cell banking on my phone. I wondered where her phone was. I gave it to her without asking questions. It was bought with her money after all. She deposited Masilo money and thanked him again. I couldn't see the exact amount but judging by the smile on Masilo's face, she paid him well. Masilo went back inside the police station. Maureen went "thanks for organising me a lawyer. I appreciate it. You can leave now, I'll come to your place tomorrow". I told her I wanted to see the guy but she gave me a funny look. I called Masilo to tell him I was leaving. He came to where I parked my car and we had a small talk. He told me to stop hiding myself and that we should do drinks at Olieven Lounge on the coming Saturday. He went back into the station and I left. On my way to my place I shed some tears. I felt like Maureen was controlling my life because of the things she bought me. I thought of calling Lebo but my sex mood was dead at that stage. I slept like a gogo that night. I didn't even want to wake up the following morning. My phone had 33 missed calls from Lebogang. You know a girl is a psycho when she calls you more than 10 times". I bathed and went to work afterwards. When I got to the office I noticed I left my phone at my place. I didn't enjoy work that day. I left exactly at my normal knocking off time, 16h00. From work I went to gym. I wanted to vent Maureen off my system. At gym I decided to hit the treadmill, the number one anger killer at gym. While I was running on the treadmill someone tapped me on my shoulder and went...

"Oh you came today. I'm sleeping your place tonight and I'm not taking no for an answer...."

THE END

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LETTERS SECTION

Hi Shaz

I love your work, your diary is amazing. I am a 22 year old student I dated a guy for 3 years and broke up with him last year because he was a cheater, and now I cannot get over him. I get really hurt everytime I see pictures of him and his new girlfriend. I can't seem to find the guy for me all I meet is dicklets, cheaters or sugar daddies with no money. Please help me to find a rich man with Rhu's manhood ;). Any race, any age. I am very beautiful and smart. I got an ass better than yours for sure lol.. #beautywithbrains.

Yours lonely student

Chapter 31

Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few. - Matthew 7:13-14

Normally men's toilets at workplaces have more than 3 urinals. So you don't expect some dude to stand behind you while you are busy with your thing. I asked the security guard why he was standing behind me and he went "I came here to check if there's no one before I knock off. It's a routine. I'm waiting for you to finish so I can do my work and write a report before I leave". I understood he was only doing his job but it was kinda creepy for him to stand behind me like that. It was like he wanted to see my dick. In this age of gays and lesbians you will never know hey. I left the loo after doing number one. When I got to my desk I noticed Zama had left. I found a notice on my desk. It was written "what did you do to me? I can't stop thinking about you. Last night I dreamed about you chowing me until the morning. Did you give me some muti?". Lol her dream was probably motivated by the conversation I had with Maureen. She was probably asking herself if there was something wrong with her. If I were a girl I'd also ask myself same question if a guy's dick faint to kick-start. I took my laptop and headed to my car. My phone rang and it was Ntombi. She was asking if she could come over. I almost laughed because I was under the impression she was mad with me after what happened over the weekend. I told her I was not available ans she hung up. Immediately after Ntombi's call Lebogang called me. She told me she was thinking of me and I said thanks. She was like "is that all you gonna say?". I told her I was driving and couldn't talk. I promised to call her later.

I started by driving to my place first. I took clothes to wear to work the following day. I drove to Maureen's place. After 20 minutes I called to tell her I was at her gate. She was like "damn, you know I really forgot you were coming. Give me 20 minutes...I'll be there". You see what I hate about women. If it was me forgetting she was coming it was going to be a big issue. She would probably give me silent treatment for 10 days. 20 minutes passed and there was no sign of Maureen. I was getting irritated and impatient. I called and she told me she was on her way. I could tell from her voice she wasn't comfortable wherever she was. I asked if she was ok and she said yes. She asked for another 20 minutes. There's nothing frustrating like waiting for a person for over 30 minutes. 20 minutes lapsed and I called again. Her phone was off. I left a voicemail "please stopping behaving like a kid. You have grey hair between your legs Maureen. I hate it when you are doing this to me. Nxa". I was pissed. I drove to my place under the influence of anger. The way I was so angry I even drove on the wrong side of the road. The next thing I heard sirens of traffic cops behind me. I pulled over on the side of the road. The traffic cop came and I opened the window. I was happy it was a woman. As expected she had a huge ass. Sometimes I think the huge ass is part of their uniform. She was like "abuti why are you driving masepa so? Do you wanna cause an accident". I went "I'm driving like this because of a woman. The world was a better place until God created Eve. Why are women like this huh? Why? Why?". She was like "eh, mos wena o tshwere ke stress. Get out of the car". I think she couldn't see me cleared when I was inside the car. When I stepped out she almost fell. I didn't know if she heard herself when she said "Wow wow". I was like "wow what?". Instead of checking my drivers licence or car she zoomed me from head to toe. She was like "what kind of stupid woman stresses a man like you when some of us are looking for men? You know what, next time don't drive like that neh. Take my number in case you need some escorting next time you are stressed". Lol my looks saved me again. I took her number and left. I didn't even ask for her same, I saved her number as Big Ass Cop.

I think the short conversation I had with the cop helped me calm down after I was stood up by Maureen. When I got to my place I switched on the TV and watched Scandal. I'm a big fan of Dintle. I think she's beautiful and has a body to die for. I would chow her all night long. Thinking of chowing made me kinda long for sex, good sex. After the Zama scenario and being stood up by Maureen I felt like having good sex with someone. I regretted telling Ntombi I was not available. I thought of calling her but my ancestors told me "high risk". Lebo called me to ask if I was still going to call her. I had forgotten I promised to call. I told her I was still busy but now done. She went "my cousin is not here and I'm bored. I feel like I know nobody in this world". We actually talked for over 30 minutes. She was intelligent. I didn't expect her to say some things she was saying. Kids these days are very intelligent, thanks to Google. For some reason I don't know our topic turned to sex. She was like "you know the day I went to cinema, I found myself fingering myself while watching the movie. I was thinking of you and my pussy got wet. You are so hot and any girl would love to have a man like you. I know I'm a school girl but I'm mature then you think". The thought of her fingering herself made Rhu-Rhu erect. She was a kid but a very sexy and hot kid. I went "I was horny when I dropped you but you are still a kid. I'll feel guilty after sleeping with you". She was like "come to my place now...you'll find me naked". She hung up.

My dick was harder than my forehead. My phone beeped and it was a Whatsapp message. It was Lebogang, she sent me a picture of her naked body. She wrote "you can come see it live yourself. Tell the security guards you are going to number 12. They'll open for you". I sat for 5 minutes thinking of what to do next. I was like "ag fuck, she's over 16. It's not like it's illegal to do a girl her age". I took a pack of condoms and my car keys. There was no way I was going to chow a kid without condoms. I learnt a lesson with the Cynthia situation. Once bitten twice shy. When I got to the car I said a short prayer "God, Matthew 6:14 says 'For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you'. Well God, I forgive everyone who sinned against me. Please forgive me for what I'm about to do. I know you are a forgiving God". I drove to Lebo's place. I was playing Leona Lewis - Forgiveness on my way to the kid's place. When I got to her complex I told the guard who I was and where I was going. They asked me to sign in. I always wonder what they do with our names, ID numbers and cell number. They directed me where to park. After parking I took my condoms and headed to number 12. The way I was so horny I couldn't even walk properly. I stood next to the door at number 12. I hesitated for couple of seconds. Before I could knock my phone rang. It was a 012- number. I answered and it was Maureen. She went "Rhu, I'm in Lyttelton police station. My lawyer is out of town. Please get me any lawyer and quickly come to the police station. Make it snappy and please don't disappoint".

I looked at the door...then my phone. I was like ......ah...

THE END

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LETTERS SECTION

Dear Rhu

I know we normally direct letters to Shaz but this one is directed to Rhu and his male friends. I am a 25 year old girl who turned lesbian last year. I have dated 5 men in my life and all of they were male whores. They dated my friends and one of them had a thing with my sister. I have a very fragile heart and I would cry at night. The worst part was they didn't even hide their cheating ways. I turned lesbian because I was tired of being hurt. Now my question, do you know the effect your heartless cheating ways have on us? Do you know how hard it is to fix a broken heart? How do you sleep at night knowing you hurt someone? I hate men.

Bye bye

Shambola

Chapter 30

Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is - Ephesians 5:15-17

You know that feeling you get when you enter a space that is rumoured to have ghosts? That's the feel I got in there. When she said "come now" her voice sounded ghostly. It was like a scene from a horror movie. I don't know whether it was because of the hard on I had or not. But something seemed just wrong nje. It was at that stage that I thought of what happened to me in Cape Town. Remember how I was lured into some place by the Cape town chick and she robbed the hell out of me. I didn't want the repeat of that episode. The chick was alone in the room but I could smell a man's Cologne, which made it even dodgy. She was like "hello, are alive? Come, I promise I won't bite you". She didn't know me and I didn't know her but she wanted me to gun for her sexually. I was like "I I I don't know you. Why must I come?". She was like "I thought foreign guys were smarter than South Africans. I'm only doing my job here. It's only R100 per round. I'm sure you can afford that". Shit, because I was dark she assumed I was not a South Africa. And you know us Tsongas we have some accent when we speak English. Secondly, she was a prostitute or pretending to be one. She wanted to make a quick cash out of me. But there was no way she was a prostitute, the hotel was too high class to be used by prostitutes. She could see I didn't have any pockets on my towel but she wanted me to pay. I turned and walked to the door. There was no way I was going to pay for sex. I have chowed hookers before but that night I didn't want one. I don't just go around chowing any hookers. I have my own target market of hookers.

When I got back to my room I had no choice but to sleep. My dick wasn't helping because it kept breathing heavily. Nxa what I stupid dick. When I had someone to chow it slept. Now that there was no one it was acting all tough. I woke up early in the morning for final touch ups on my preparation for the meeting. My boss had faith in me and I didn't wanna disappoint. At around 08h00 Zama knocked and told me she was ready. She was wearing formal, black and white and looked very gorgeous. I was like "maybe we can have a morning glory before we leave. You know what they say about morning glory, it makes your entire day glorious". I was trying to touch her as I said that. She went "nuh I will pass tata. You had a chance last night and you showed me how weak you are. It's true that looks can be deceiving. Someone did what you couldn't achieve last night. You see the glow on my face? It's the joy of great sex. You should try Men's Clinic, they help men like you". WTF, she hit my ego more than 100 times. I have always seen myself as a sex machine. I always get compliments whenever I chow girls and I know their compliments are genuine because they always cry to come back for more. I was like "no no no what happened last night is not how I am. I think it's because you are very hot and my body couldn't handle it. I have had a crush on you from the first day I laid my eyes on you but because you are a junior I couldn't approach you. Let's do it now, I promise you will literally beg for more". I expected my dick engage in some solidarity but it showed the opposite. It feel it was shrinking inside my undie. Talk about being disloyal to he struggle nxa. She was like "lol that's a very lame excuse and I have heard it many times before from men like you. Can we just go to work. I know that's one area where you excel. Come let's go before your cowardly dick gets paralysed ha ha ha ha ha". Mxm she thought she was being funny and I didn't find any humour in what she said.

We went to the meeting and it went very well. The client was very happy with me and Zama to some certain extend. She didn't do much, she was just taking minutes nje. The client said we should stay and have lunch before heading back to Pretoria. Before I could say no Zama jumped in and said "thanks, we would love to stay for lunch". I heard a rumour that Xhosa girls love food but I didn't believe it until that day. I had no choice but to stay for food. The client and his associate were very friendly. The topics we engaged in were of informal nature. Zama asked one of the associate if he was married. Shit, it was so embarrassing. I know she was still new to the corporate world and didn't know much about how to conduct herself in front of clients, but that wasn't on. Rule number 1, never ever ask questions that make a client uncomfortable, especially personal questions. The client went "I am a divorcee. My wife and I parted ways last year". Zama looked so happy. I think she wanted to ask further questions but I told them we still had a long to go. I thanked their time and we left. When we got to the car I reprimanded her. I told her what she did was unprofessional and could cost us a client. She laughed and went "ha ha ha ha ha I know it's not even about the client. You are just angry I know your secret. It's not the end of the day. There are many men like you out there. You just need to go to Men's Clinic and have the problem solved. Easy as ABC my dear. When you come back from Men's Clinic maybe we can talk". I hate it when people don't take serious things seriously. Her stupid childish behaviour sucked and she thought she was being 'cool' nxa.

On our way back to Pretoria I literally gave her a silence treatment. Maureen called me while I was driving. She went "since you bought a Merc you have become very distant and skaars like pipi e nnyane in Limpopo". I was using the car's hands free system to answer the call because I was driving. I was glad Maureen said 'since you bought...'. She made it sound like I was the one who bought the car. Zama was listening to my conversation with Maureen. She asked where I was and I told her I was on my way back to Pretoria from Polokwane to meet a client. She went "can you please come sleep over tomorrow? I want you to fuck me until my pussy's temperature reaches record high. The last time we had sex for hours and I couldn't stop thinking about it the following day. You are a sex machine you know that?". Lol someone would swear I had bought Maureen to say such things. She said the right things at the right time. I stole a look on Zama's face and I could see she was listening attentively. I went "you know my dick knows a good pussy when it sees one. I go for too long with you because you and I connect. Even now I'm getting horny as we speak". I didn't lie, I had a hard at that moment, which I was sure Zama saw. Maureen and I agreed that the following day would be our bonking day. When Zama and I got to Pretoria I dropped her at the Centurion Gautrain station and then drove to my place. I was very tired. I took a bath, switched off my phone and slept. The following morning I went to work late, around 9am. My boss told me he received positive feedback from Limpopo and was very impressed by my hard work. After the talk with my boss I called Maureen to tell her I'd be at her place around 9pm. I wanted to work until late. I wanted to impress my boss while I was still hot. Most people left the office around 5. By 6pm it was just me and surprisingly Zama was still there. Around 18h30 I wrapped up my stuff and prepared to leave. I normally go to the loo to do number 1 before leaving. Our toilets had mirrors in front of urinals. Like who the fuck want to look at themselves when they pee?

From the mirror I noticed someone was standing behind me. Shit, it was .....

THE END

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LETTERS SECTION

Dear Shaz

Is there something wrong with a girl being a sex addict? Most guys I dated left me because they couldn't keep up with my sexual appetite. I like doing it everywhere with my man, in the kitchen, lounge, car, rooftop, toilet and wherever. I'm not a drug junkie or anything. I just love sex. I believe ssex is the best thing ever. My latest ex told me that I needed help because it was abnormal for a girl to love sex the way I do. Am I abnormal?

Sexy regards,

Duracell Girl

Chapter 29

O LORD, be gracious to us; we long for you. Be our strength every morning, our salvation in time of distress- Isaiah 33:2

Temptation is very powerful. You can tell yourself you don't wanna do something but once temptation shows up a 'no' will not be an option. When the towel fell she went "yhoooo intoni? Yho yho yho I have never seen such a big thing in my life. This Shangaan has a huge snake". I hate it when people recite poems about my dick. It's not my fault where they come from Big is Small. I was like "no no no don't do that. It will ruin our professional relationship". To be honest, I wanted to chow her but I didn't trust the bitch. Xhosa chicks don't do something without an ulterior motivr. I know a guy who chowed one and within 2 weeks she told him she was pregnant. He only discovered when the baby was born that he wasn't the father. When he fucked her she was already pregnant but she wasn't sure who impregnated her. The poor guy was played. Zama went "don't be a brat. We are far away from work. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. In this case what happens in Limpompo stays in Limpompo. I had a lot of wine and right now all I need is a hard dick inside me". I know they say we are all equal but I still find it unAfrican for a woman to beg for a dick. I went "Zama, please don't do this to me hle. You are just an intern and my seniors will think I took advantage of a junior staff member. I don't want to be like Zwelinzima Vavi". Sometimes we have to think beyond a pussy. Many people ruined their career because of a mere pussy. I didn't wanna be that guy who got fired because of a pussy. I didn't wanna be that guy who was accused of rape by a fellow colleague.

She grabbed my balls, then my dick...my balls again and I groaned like a lion. I went "stooooooooooppppp please". She took off her top and told me to play with her breasts. Sometimes I think all Xhosa girls are somehow related, especially those from Port Elizabeth. They are all beautiful and yellow in complexion. Her breasts looked as if they were designed by Michaelangelo. My dick was not hard, it was a ROCK. And I could tell my sperms were just around the corner. Guys will know this. When your dick is very hard any friction can trigger the sperms. She wanted to go down on me but I told her not to. I don't wanna release an ocean in her mouth. She took off her mini and told me "do what Shangaans are known for. Fuck me Rhulani. I'm not your colleague tonight, I'm your toy". Shit, her dirty talk drove me crazy. Most people don't enjoy sex because they treat it as some sermon in church. Sex is dirty and you must talk dirty. Don't talk to your man or chick like she's some senior church member. I was like "I don't have a condom, I can't do you without a condom. I don't wanna get sick or have a baby with you?". She looked at me and went "what the fuck!!!! Do I look sick? Look at me Rhulani". I always get worried when people ask that question. It's not like people who are sick have number plate ....SICK 007 GP. She went "ok fine, I brought 6 condoms". What kinda woman carries male condoms with her? It was quite obvious she had everything planned. She made me lie on my bed and put the condom on my dick. She struggled for few seconds because my dick is big. I could feel the friction was going to lead to something I didn't want. After putting on the condom she rubbed my dick head. Shit, I came from the rubbing. It was not your one drop kinda come....it was come-come-come.

That's how horny I was. She was like "what the fuck? Are you a fake Shangaan or what?". It was a very embarrassing. It was a miscarriage of sex. Her eyes were so red I could see she wanted to get a dick. My dick did what most men fear, especially if you are chowing her for the first time. It died after coming. I literally saw it dying and I tried every trick in book. I even tried to think of the hottest chick I ever chowed but it didn't help. My dick just died. Have you ever seen a dead dick in a condom? It looks like a fake sausage. Mine was worse because it's black like me. It looked like a tail of a monkey wrapped in a colourless plastic. Zama went "mfundini, sdenge... you gonna make that thing hard again or else I am not going to a meeting tomorrow". What she didn't know was her threats were not making things better, she was actually traumatising my dick further. Sometimes a dick behaves like a pregnant woman, you can never understand its mood. Zama took off the condom and wiped my dick. She started sucking it but still my dick was still in a mortuary state, dead. Most Xhosa girls have BJ lips. She tried every BJ trick but my dick was acting like a Zulu taxi driver, very stubborn. Zama sulked and left. I felt defeated and weak. It was not my plan to fuck her but because I had seen her pussy I wanted to fuck her. Call it pride of a man. No man wants to see a pussy and do nothing about it. It makes one feel like half a man. I tried to tell her to come back but she didn't hear any of it. I guess she felt sexually abused. I couldn't stop thinking of how she was going to tell our colleagues how weak I am. My female acquaintance once told me that girls talk about weak guys all the time. I didn't want to be part of that statistics of weak men. I tried to play with my dick but it remained Zulu. I gave up and slept.

I had a funny dream. Zama was knocking at other hotel rooms asking for sex. No one wanted her. She knocked at my room and I welcomed her with opened legs. She was naked and I jumped on her like a hungry crocodile. I woke up horny, not horny but very horny. I felt like my dick was about to explode. Shit some dreams should be banned by God. I have seen Rhu-Rhu very hard before but that night he was on another level. If he was a tennis player I'd definitely name him a male version of Serena Williams. It was like my ancestors visited me in my sleep and fixed the screw that led to my erectile load shedding. I quickly woke up and wrapped myself with a towel. I wasn't wearing any top. I headed straight to Zama's room. I wanted to bring my dignity back. I didn't want that Xhosa girl to judge my fellow Tsonga guys based on what happened to me. I knocked at her door for about 5 minutes with no response. I went back to my room and called her. Her phone rang but there was no response. My dick was so hungry I could chow any hole at that moment. To be honest, had a guy appeared at that moment I would have 'anal'ized' him on the spot. I went back to Zama's room and knocked again. I was going "Zama, open please. My dick is up now and I want you badly. Please pretty please. Assomblief tog". I didn't realise some chick 3 door from Zama's door was looking at me laughing. I was a bit embarrassed. She smiled and I smiled back. She waved for me to 'come' and I hesitated. She waved again and walked into the room. I was like "what the fuck....I'm going". I was walking very slow. The door wasn't closed so I just walked in. The light was dim so I couldn't see clearly.

A voice went "come here" and I felt my hair divorcing my head.....

THE END

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LETTERS SECTION

Dear Shaz

I think I should have done this but I didn't have the guts too...but now I do...All I've been longing to say is that your diary is extremely awesome...no words nor emotions can really explain how I feel after reading this diary...I would love to take this opportunity to thank you and know that we are very grateful for your loyalty and your talent is overwhelming.... we are very blessed to have an author who loves and spoils us like you do....your dedication is extremely and highly appreciated... May God be with you and may He give you all your heart desires and bless you abundantly.... this diary brings happiness and joy to our hearts.... I and your other fans sincerely love you and admire your work....we are trully honoured to have someone like you... it feels like we have known you forever lol even though we don't even know how you look like..and believe it's interesting because every fan of yours has an imaginary image of you and that's awesome.... and please continue blessing us with your talent...I love and admire you...Take care

Regards,

Kutlwano